Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Am I being responsible, or turning my boys into sissies?

I am especially sensitive to this after Joseph's stitches last week! When I give freedom, I feel guilty. When I don't I wonder if I am crippling them. Our neighbors have trampolines (with out nets) they scare me to death. I usually say "no", but I am the only mother on our street who does. So I grit my teeth, tense up and say "yes" every now and then. Knowing that one of them could be seriously hurt. This has been a big stressor to me in neighborhood living.

Well, we have some new neighbors with 4 kids, one of which is a 10 year old boy, whom Jack idolizes. This boy has broadened our horizons with daily Lacrosse games, bead gun wars and skateboard ramps. I am not comfortable with any of these things. Jack has already been bruised in the chest by a bb, before I realized that they were playing guns.

So far, I make him come home when they get the guns out and I will not let him go down the skateboard ramp, which is about 4 feet high.... but I don't see any of the other mothers saying "no". I want to protect them, but not make them the laughing-stock of the neighborhood.

and I thought that boys were easy!!!! Do I just need to lighten up?

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well considering your husband thinks you are laid back relative to me...then, you know my response. No guns, no trampolines, no ramps! But, I am probably raising two sissy boys myself. But, at least they will live to see age 10! :) Somewhere in between us and "them" lies a middle ground. Finding it is the problem. When you do find it, let me know where it is :) I certainly need help in this area.
Love you!

Anonymous said...

There is something to be said for common sense. Does it make sense to allow your boys to be in a situation that is potentially dangerous? You have to make decisions for your children that are right for you. You are the perfect parent for your children and God has placed them in your care for this reason. Ask God to give you courage to stand by your decisions. By the way, I don't see your boys acting like sissies at all.

Anonymous said...

Erica sent me to read this blog and I laughed out loud!!

If you want my two cents...no tramps with out nets!? I mean....why would you even have one without a net...do you want your kid to break an arm or worse??? And girl...I am as laid back as they come and I don't let my boys play with guns - AT ALL. Light Sabers (star wars things) are even tough for me, although I have give in where this is concerend - in CERTAIN situations! ERica has seen my pain with this one!

And I swear...I am treating skate boards like driving a car...baby steps - practice...and when they think they are ramp ready...I swear I will have a set of tests to make sure they know what they are doing!

I'm all for riding bikes fast...and I even allow the helmets off when in front of the street - I allow TV and some video games...and if my boys end up sissies...I just they are happy sissies!!! :)

Go with your gut girl! Those other parents will wish they had your take if anything happens to their kid! (And of course...I pray that it does not...so don't take that the wrong way if you are reading and you are one of those other parents!!) :)

Lance said...

A relative of ours recently broke his arm falling off a trampoline. It was a bad break, but it could have been worse. The surround nets are less effective with teens, but I believe they are a must for small children.

What is a bead gun? Bruised with a bb - sounds like dangerous play. Boys want to play with guns - how about Nerf guns? We allow sword fights with super-soft swords.

I guess I have less concern about ramps in general, but the set-up and the kids involved are factors. Safety gear, such as, helmets are a good idea.

I think about this kind of thing all the time. Kids need to take falls so they learn the limits of their bodies and actions, but trips to the ER do not have to be part of the lesson, though sometimes it is part of the lesson. Thankfully, our bodies are wonderfully designed to heal in most circumstances.

There is no "right answer" here, but it sounds to me like you are defining the appropriate boundaries. Your boys are not on the sissy track. :) Besides, your husband is a "guy's guy", so they have a good first role model!